when everything's made to be broken (i just want you to know who i am)
by rosemargaery
Summary: Lord Gendry Baratheon goes to Storm's End by himself. He finds a family there ( or Arya needs to breath, before she goes back to him. The Seaworth family is in for a ride) { third part of the 'long live' series }
1. Chapter 1

**i.**

She doesn't ask him to wait, and he doesn't.

The last time he sees her, Arya is saying goodbye to her siblings, to Jon Snow who is meant to live in the wall. His eyes never leave her from afar and it's only when he is already moving that Gendry realizes he is following her, to wherever she goes. It's not exactly surprising and she must think the same because when the Stark girl turns around to look at him, there is not a hint of surprise in her eyes. There is only sorrow and he is really stupid, but even he can't understand the longing. Arya loves him, he is sure of it, but she can not stay.

His body is faster than her and sooner than expected, his arms are full of Arya Stark and his lips get a last taste of her. They kiss and kiss, and it's urgent and sad and so full of love that he doesn't know how he will ever think of anything else that is not this. He is pretty sure he never will.

"Let me go with you" It's stupid even before the idea leaves his lips, but his heart is set and ready for another rejection. Even when nothing happens, at least no one can't say that Lord Baratheon didn't try his very best. That he gave everything on him to make her stay. Again, she has that look of sadness mixed with fondness and after another quick peck on the lips, she is far way from him once more.

"You will be a good lord. Now they are your family" Gendry doesn't say that no one could ever be his family, not the way she is, but he only has it on him to nod at her. He wants to be a good ruler, to feed and take care of his people and just as she would if she stayed, the regret would eat him alive if he at least didn't try to do what's best for them.

They looked at each other for a moment more, before Arya walks away. He doesn't follow her this time and it breaks the last functioning part of his heart.

**ii.**

Ser Davos doesn't join him at Storm's Ends at the beginning. He has new responsibilities beside King Bran and Gendry can't shake the feeling that without one of the few men he trusts to know what to do, he will fuck it all up. Still, he owns him too much so with a couple of his people and all his new power, he sends word to his family that they are all welcome to join him at the castle. After a couple of moons when he gains his people trust and love, the whole Seaworth family arrives, wary and slightly scared.

Lady Marya Seaworth looks him up and down for a moment, all motherly protection in front of her children and after a quick explanation, he gets them all to sit and eat.

"He is the closest thing I had to a father" It wasn't much, or a long time they spent together, but it was so much more than Gendry ever had and he lets her know. Being a Lord hasn't stop him from being honest and it never will.

The whole family soon fill the empty castle and he is incredibly grateful for the lack of silence. He takes to play with the younger children and in his reading lessons, he takes with him the ones that want to learn. At the end of the first year, they all call him big brother and Lady Seaworth commands him to take a bath every time he comes back after running to the forge. When Davos joins them, there is a feast and laughter, and Gendry thinks this is how a family feels like.

There is always an empty spot beside him at the table, and Davos, good and kind Ser Davos, tells him that Arya Stark has send word to know that she is okay and safe out there in the sea.

He dreams of her, with the wind moving her hair.

**iii.**

At the beginning, he wants to cry every time he thinks of her.

He had fought in many words, but his heart was still kind and gentle when it had gotten broken over and over again. His mind still remembers the happy stolen moment and each of them are stakes for his soul, reminding him that even for a second, he had it all before it was taken away from him.

After he has healed, at least a little, sadness gives space for resentment.

Did Arya really love him? Wouldn't love be enough if she did? What was so important on the sea that she couldn't stay with him? She knew how scared he was of this all and she still left him without a single doubt. Arya left him, rejected him, and what did she expect? That he waited for her?

Those days, the forge, and the entire place, hears him punch iron with more force than needed. No one dares to ask because everyone remembers Robert Baratheon's fury for losing the woman he loves and that is a door no one wants to open. Except for Davos, when he arrives, who sits there until he decides his burden is too much to bear it alone.

Usually, resentment gave space for understanding.

He asked too much of her, Gendry knows. She is a free wolf and that's why he fell in love with her; caging her would be their downfall. If she wanted this and him, Arya would have to come on her own devices and choose him, since he had chosen her long ago.

He wasn't going to wait for her, but it was just matter of luck that when she is finally in front of him, Gendry is even more in love with her than the day she left.

* * *

This is a companion series to 'these hands had to let it go free' and some sort of sequel to 'say you will remember me', that will follow gendry and arya in the storm's lands.

aka

#prayfortheseaword2019


	2. Chapter 2

_**i.**_

The fact that he loves her does not make anything easier. In fact, is the contrary.

Gendry almost trips himself multiple times with how fast he runs to the Great Hall, followed by a very conflicted Davos and the looks of everyone that lives in the castle. They had never seen him like this and it's not surprising, since it's the first time Arya Stark has decided to play him a visit. Only a few know of the story between their lord and the bringer of the light and even them are not aware of the whole thing; no one but Davos.

He runs and runs, because something must be wrong. Arya would not come to him if she didn't need anything and that alone terrifies him, because he never had something worthy of her. But she is here and there must be something. His brain is quickly imagining the worse scenarios, so when their eyes finally lock with her, the Lord of Storm's Ends loses all sense of property, if he ever grew one.

His arms are full on her in a second and she is rigid as stone, but doesn't move away from his hold, what adds another thing to the list of reasons why something must be horribly wrong. There is no time for staying in that thought, because Gendry looks down and puts her slightly away, still holding her, trying to check for any injury. The scars are the same as he last saw her and he doesn't realize he is asking her what's wrong millions of times until she puts her hand on his arms.

"Gendry" He can't remember when was the last time his name sounded so perfect, but her voice has an inch of worry and it makes him come back to the real world. "There is nothing wrong, idiot. I'm fine" Her tone goes to amused, but he is too confused.

"But you are here. Something must be wrong" His eyes search for something on hers, anything, that makes sense, but there is nothing. "Something… Something must be, right?" Could this be real? Could she really be there just because she wants to? Hope blooms in his chest as his breathing calm down, the corners of his lips turning up. Arya could be here for _him_, there is a chance that she…

"There was a storm" Gone are every trace of emotion from her voice and her eyes as she releases herself from his hold, putting a step between them. Gendry feels like he is being hit in the stomach, just like the day of the stupid proposal. "It was the only safe place we could go until it passed" Broken hope hurts again, harder than the last time and he has to search for everything inside him to hold himself together. Suddenly, he is aware of all the people that work in the castle surrounding them, watching as their lord makes a fool of himself in front of the woman that saved the world. _Again_, but they don't need to know that.

He doesn't know who he is talking to, because he can't still move his hurt eyes away from her. "Give Lady Arya whatever she and her man need. Prepare rooms for them" And with that, he turns around and leaves the room, quick steps moving him away as everyone bows as he passes.

Davos, who had seen it all, knows that there hasn't being a storm nearby in at least a whole month. He doesn't think it's wise to call Lady Arya on her lie.

**_ii._**

Everyone leaves him alone in the forge. She doesn't seek him and he spends his days and night hitting things.

_Ours is the fury. _

No one dares to disturb him and he spends the first day alone thinking in how stupid he is. Forgotten are the times when he understood the reasons behind her travels, because the only thing he knows is that she keeps playing with him. Gendry keeps loving her and she knows and keeps haunting him, like a ghost. Arya has no right to do this, to just appear and ask for things, for him, just to go away like the last time.

What did she expect? That he treated her like a long-lost friend and dine with her like nothing? That he could be back to warm her bed whenever she wanted to? Was that it? He knew that if he saw her, the whole resolution was going to go to waste and he would be back to do whatever she pleased, so he stayed where he was, building whatever that could come out after so many hits.

It was peaceful for a day.

The second one, Davos appears to remind him that his hearings with the common folks are about to begin, what sends guilt all over her blood. He wants to be a good lord, wants to continue with his lie, but right now he is not in any mood to hear anything.

"I can't go. I'll go tomorrow"

Davos looks like he wants to protest, but only nods in his directions and disappears. Gendry knows it can't be more than a couple of hours later when his wife shows up with food and her two smaller children. She leaves it in front of him with a frown, hands on her hips and he knows he has to look up very, very, slowly if he doesn't want to eat bad for the rest of his life. He may be a Lord, but he is still scared of that pose.

"Your lady is going to send my husband to his early grave" That caught his attention and he is about to protest that she is not his lady, by any means, but she continues like nothing. "She has decided that she will hear the common folks. Why? Beats me but no matter what Davos tells her, she is still doing it for the past hour" It almost makes him smile, but he is too confused again. Arya is hearing the people? What for? It crosses his mind that maybe she wants to know how badly he is doing this.

"Is she doing a good job?" That was certainly not the question Marya Seaworth was waiting from him, but she only shrugs.

"Could do worse, I guess"

"Then let her"

_**iii.**_

He ignores his duties for a few days more, going to his room only to bath and then comes back to the forge to work and sleep. They never cross paths and Gendry is thankful for it.

Until, of course, she crosses a line.

Davos is wearing his best scolding-father face when he announces him that Lady Arya is thinking about making negotiations with her own men to bring food and other things from the lands beyond the sea.

"Lad, no one knows what to do or who is in charge anymore"

He is not, he really is not, but these are his people and Arya could play with him all she wanted to, but now with them.

* * *

Comments are always nice!


	3. Chapter 3

"Lady Stark"

His voice is unusually hard and there is more than a hint of angriness on it, something that surprises her, even when it shouldn't. A quick look over the people that were in the meeting tells her that she is not the only one and for a moment, her heart is warm to know he leads with good temper. Arya doesn't look at him, but nods in his direction enough to let him know she is listening. When nothing happens for a few seconds of tense silence, she is forced to look up and meet bright blue.

"I need to speak with Lady Stark" This time, his tone is colder, more serene, but angry still. No one makes a move until Davos clears his throat obviously and then it's a sea of half bows while everyone almost runs to leave them alone. The sound of the door closing is the last thing she hears for a while, but neither of them move or look away from each other. This is the confrontation she had being waiting for, the one she knew it was coming, what makes not entirely unprepared for the argument that surely will follow.

"Care to tell me what the hell do you think you are doing?" It's slightly weird that he is almost at point to scream at her, but Arya doesn't let anything show in her face. A valid question, a good starting point.

"A treaty to get food and things from beyond the sea. They would be helpful for…"

"You have no right to do that!" That makes her close her mouth instantly, assessing him with her eyes. He seems like he is about to start shaking, his arms close to his chest and his hands closed. It's almost burning her to not move closer to him, to reach for his arms and caress them until he relaxes. Gendry could be a Baratheon in name now, but that angry look on his face does not belong there, not when he is with her. Still, the girl doesn't move and waits two beats until she tries to speak with him again.

"I wasn't going to do anything without consulting with you" He is the lord after all.

He doesn't seem to care about what she has to say, because he is shaking his head quickly. "Who do you think you are, Arya? That just because you are a highborn you can come and barge directions cause you feel like it? That you can hear _my_ people and offer them solutions even when you are not going to be here to see them unfold? That's not how this works!" He comes a step closer and Arya would lie if she said his words don't hurt her, because they are true. It would also be a lie that the way he speaks make something come alive in her belly, something that was long forgotten since she left Westeros. She is glad that he seems to not be over. "They are not your people!" She knows what he really means, but she closes her eyes and hopes he doesn't explain, but he does.

"You didn't want them to be" Even when her eyes don't look at him, she knows his expression has soften into plain and sincere hurt. _You didn't want me_. The true meaning of that lingers between them and for all the gods, she wants to tell him that is a lie. That there was nothing that she wanted more than him, than to stay, but death had taken too much of her and there were parts of herself that she needed back before that.

For how explosive they were back then, in another time, their fight is full of long moments of silence. This time, he is the one to break it.

"Arya" This time he sounds pleading, defeated, and she has to open her eyes and look at him. There are so many emotions written on his expression and she knows that she is the one causing them all. "You didn't want this"

Did she?

When she was little, Arya wanted to be a lord. Even when she didn't understand a thing of what was happening, the image of her father talking with everyone mesmerized her, burned in her memory. Later, her only want was to survive, but there was a little part of her that knew she would have to take the North if everyone else was dead. She always thought Gendry and Hot Pie would help her with it.

Again, her words fail her, because nothing comes out of her mouth.

The responsibility is not the reason why she refused him, but the completely sureness of her death in King's Landing. Then it was the need to find herself, to grow, before she could settle anywhere. It has never being about the people and even less, about him.

"I do now"

There is so much more explaining she has to do, but as soon as she speaks, something shifts in Gendry. His eyes scan her, like he is trying to find something out of place in her, but when he doesn't, they stay in her face. Arya waits, not really sure for what, and tries to not even breath too loud. Whatever he is thinking or meditating, it seems like it's going to turn her world.

And it does.

In half a second, he has cross the space between them and taken her face in his hands, slamming his face against hers. It's intense, so full of everything that she has to hold his arms to steady herself. It's too much, but Arya gives as good as she takes and a moment later, he is lifting her up and holding her close to him. His hands are rough and the way they hold her is for sure going to leave a mark on her skin. It doesn't matter, not even in the slightest, because Arya has dreamed with this so many times since she went away that she can barely think this is real. He is _there_, so entirely hers.

A moan comes out of her lips as he moves down to her neck, to the place where he can feel her pulse against his mouth. Then, another comes out of him as her hand finds its way down to his pants. Many other come as they press against each other, still fully clothed but with wondering hands all over, filling the room with sounds they are not conscious they are doing.

Everyone else is, apparently.

There is a knock on the door that neither of them register, then a lot more until Davos's muffled voice comes out from the other side. "Lord Gendry!" He never calls him like that, what makes Gendry move slightly away from Arya's neck, pressing his forehead against her as he tries to catch his breath.

"Davos" He sounds irritated, what makes Arya chuckle slightly.

"It would be wise…" He starts like all the times he is going to ask him to do something, but doesn't want to say it right away. "It you would try to keep your… _Meeting_ a little more private. The castle…"

"Davos" Gendry's voice comes a little calmer, pressing a quick kiss on Arya's cheek. "Make everyone go away, please" Arya can hear the indignant noise the other man does on the other side of the door and for the way Gendry's cheeks are slightly red, she knows he will be embarrassed as soon as the blood goes to his brain, but she can't help but laugh openly.

He has a smile on his face when he kisses her again. A real smile.

* * *

This took forever to write!

In the next one: Sex doesn't solve anything IF YOU DON'T TALK.


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